Adolescent Sexuality and Premarital Sex

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“Seek truth while you are young, for if you don’t, it will later escape your grasp” [Plato]

Many modern societies offer young people the freedom to consume until their credit cards max out; to have sex whenever they want and with whomsoever they want; to live undisturbed in a solipsistic bubble etc., but this vision of man degrades him. [Solipsistic bubble: solipsism is belief in self as the only reality; the belief that the only thing somebody can be sure of is that he/she exists, and that true knowledge of anything else is impossible.]

Teenagers are growing up in a toxic moral climate where sex – for many – has almost become a compulsory recreational indoor sport, with so-called protected sex to prevent pregnancy and abortion the quick solution to its unwanted consequences.

But young people need help to understand the character development needed to make their hopes of happy marriages a reality. They need the support, example and conversation with their parents and other caring adults to this end. They need a supportive social framework around them throughout adolescence so that they can grow in understanding and avoid making many serious mistakes.

Young people need to know that the human brain is programmed to make three things impossible to ignore: food, sex and danger and that food and sex are arguably the two most enjoyable necessities of life.

The misuse of this natural appetite for food in the forms of overeating or eating too much of the wrong foods can cause problems of heart disease, diabetes, obesity and many others.

Similarly, sex is an appetite we are born with. As new research indicates, our interest in sex is built into our brain, and that this fascination with sex is vital for procreation. Just as with food, sex can be misunderstood and misused especially by adolescents.

However, it is widely known by neuroscientists and confirmed by published scientific research that the “wiring” of the developing adolescent brain is incomplete and that functions such as self-control, judgment and emotions are underdeveloped leading to rash decisions and acting on impulses. Thus it can be difficult for teens to “anticipate the consequences” of their decisions especially when they are in an emotional situation or they are aroused sexually. To encourage adolescents therefore to “take calculated risks” and “trust in their own capacities” with regard to their sexual feelings or behaviour is irresponsible.

Adults think with the frontal lobe of the brain, whereas teens think from the amygdala; the part of the brain responsible for feelings.

Just as with food, sex can be misunderstood and misused. Contrary to International Planned Parenthood Federation and like-minded NGOs (including the WHO and the UNO) who promote consequence-free sex through the teaching of comprehensive sexuality education in our children’s schools, 4 major risks are associated with pre-marital sex in this order of importance:

(1) Mortal sin i.e. a serious offence against God, neighbour and self,

(2) Emotional and psychological damages,

(3) Sexually Transmitted Infections/diseases (STIs/STDs) and

(4) Pregnancy.

Pregnancy is the least damaging of the four risks as sex is ordered for procreation within marriage where it is most welcome but outside marriage, it becomes immoral and a mortal sin. STDs are largely curable but they could lead to infertility etc. Emotional and psychological damages are far more damaging than STDs and pregnancy and could last a lifetime. Mortal sin is the worst thing that could ever happen to us and against which we must put up our fiercest fight as it is indeed Self-Inflicted Nuisance

 (1) Mortal sin i.e. a serious offence against God, neighbour and self

Teens and young people must learn to recognize the three elements which together make them commit mortal sin: a place, a stimulant and a person. The location where you meet is the place, a desirable ambience: music, drink, drug or any other form of entertainment is the stimulant and the one with whom you commit sin (have illicit fun) is the person (for masturbation your genitals serve as the person). Always endeavor to ensure that the three elements do not co-exist, because if they do, it will be very difficult if not impossible (but for the grace of God) for anyone (especially girls) not to commit sin. When faced with temptation, do not attempt to stand to fight it or to “negotiate” yourself out of the danger; simply turn and run. Be happy on such occasions to be a coward. To avoid sin, there are three important steps to take: (1) avoid the occasion of sin (2) avoid the occasion of sin and (3) avoid the occasion of sin. We hope the emphasis makes our point.

Scientists are only just beginning to ‘see’ and understand the results of sexual involvement that could last a lifetime in what is being referred to as the emotional and psychological impacts of sex which we tag the 2nd risk.

 

 

          (2) Emotional and psychological damages of premarital sex

Little boys’ and little girls’ bodies look much the same as they reflect the sexual immaturity of their minds. They lack the interest and physical development that define a human being who is equipped for sex and child bearing. The physical changes that define puberty are driven by sex hormones; estrogens for girls and testosterone for boys. These hormones from ovaries and testes begin to be produced in increasing quantities between ages 9 and 11 for girls, 10 and 13 for boys. At puberty, the male and female procreative organs develop to maturity. With the physical changes that accompany puberty come mental, emotional and psychological transitions/changes. Only neuroscientists can see the changes that puberty produces in the brain.

Sexual arousal

Sexual arousal does not begin with the parts of your body that feel the most aroused. Sexual excitement is actually centred in the brain. There is usually a progression of physical contact, touching, light kissing and other contacts which sooner or later acquire the purpose of having sexual intercourse. This fascinating process is clearly visible with modern brain scan technology, revealing different areas of the brainlighting up”.

 THE BRAIN: A Sex Organ?

Scientists now agree with what some have been saying for years that the largest and most important sex organ is the human brain, which remains the most complicated three-pound mass of matter in the known universe.

Some of the neurochemicals: dopamine, oxytocin, vasopressin produced involuntarily in the brain play amazing, exciting, and almost unbelievable roles in our thinking, desires, and behaviour.

Dopamine is a “reward signal” for good or bad acts. Sex is one of the strongest generators of the dopamine reward. For this reason, young people particularly are vulnerable to falling into a cycle of dopamine reward for unwise sexual behaviour – they can get hooked to it. But the beneficial effect of dopamine for the married couple is that it “addicts” them to sex with each other.

Oxytocin, another neurochemical, is critically important to healthy sex and bonding. It is present in both sexes, but primarily active in females, where it is released

  • during intimate touching by/with another individual;
  • during sexual intercourse;
  • at the onset of labour in a pregnant woman and
  • With nipple stimulation during breast-feeding.

The bonding effect of oxytocin is so powerful for the mother to give her life for her baby not because the baby is “cute” but because she is bound (bonded) to that baby.

When a woman is touched warmly, meaningfully and intimately, oxytocin is released into her brain increasing her desire for more touch and causes bonding of the woman to the man she has been spending time in physical contact with. With sex and orgasm, the woman’s brain is flooded with oxytocin, causing her to desire the same kind of contact.

The desire to connect is not just an emotional feeling. Bonding is real and almost like the adhesive effect of glue – a powerful connection that cannot be undone without great emotional pain.

Oxytocin produces a feeling of trust in a person with whom a female is in close contact; hence a woman who is being approached sexually by a man is very vulnerable. He is almost always stronger than she is.

While the hormonal effect of oxytocin is ideal for marriage, it can cause problems for the unmarried woman or single girl who is approached by a man desiring sex. A woman’s brain can cause her to be blindsided by a relationship that she thought was good because of the physical contact and the oxytocin response it generates, hence our advice is avoid even a 20-second hug from strange men.

The danger of a mere 20-second hug

Louann Brizendine, M.D., a neuropsychiatrist at the University of California, offers compelling evidence of how quickly the oxytocin bonding can be initiated: “From experiments on hugging, we also know that oxytocin is naturally released in the brain after a twenty-second hug from a partner – sealing the bond between the huggers and triggering the brain’s trust circuits”.

So don’t let a guy hug you unless you plan to trust him i.e. unless you know him well enough to consider him worthy of your trust, don’t hug him. Politely refuse his hug.

Young women especially need to be aware of the powerful bonding effect of oxytocin. When a couple is involved in even a short-term relationship and breaks up and then each of them moves on to a new sex partner, they are breaking the oxytocin bond that has formed.

The severing of this bond explains the incredibly painful emotions people often feel when they break up. They cannot know that they actually are seriously damaging a bonding mechanism that they are born with, a mechanism put there to allow them to, in the future, have a healthy bonded marriage that is a stable relationship and provides a healthy nest for children that might be conceived and born into their home.

Note well that dopamine and oxytocin are involuntary value-neutral processes that cannot distinguish between a one-night stand and a life-long affair.

Women are not the only ones who bond during intimate physical contact. The neurochemical responsible for the male response and synaptic change is called Vasopressin.

It plays a role in blood pressure regulation through its influence on kidney function and fluid regulation in the body. Its two primary functions related to relationships are bonding of the man to his mate and attachment to his offspring

  Consequences of partial bonding

Male brains are flooded with vasopressin during sexual intercourse which produces a partial bond with every woman they have sex with. They do not realize that this pattern of having sex with one woman and then breaking up and then having sex with another woman limits them to experience only one form of brain activity common to humans involved sexually – the dopamine rush of sex.

They risk damaging a vital, innate ability to develop long-term emotional attachment that results from sex with the same person over and over again. Going from sex partner to sex partner causes his brain to mould and gel so that it eventually begins accepting that sexual pattern as normal. This pattern seems to interfere with the development of the neurological circuits necessary for the long-term relationships that result in stable marriages and strong family development.

Changing sexual partners therefore seems to damage their ability to bond in a committed relationship like sticky tape that loses its stickiness after being applied and removed multiple times.

   Summarizing the Brain and Sex

It is now firmly established that a person’s largest and most important sexual organ is the brain. Each person actually changes the very structure of the brain with the choices s/he makes and the behaviour s/he engages in. Our choices are affected by the chemicals in our brains. These chemicals are in place for important reasons and have much to do with the survival of the human race.

Dopamine floods our brains and rewards us for exciting and risky behaviour – like growing up and separating from our parents, like committing to another person in marriage, like birthing and raising children.

Oxytocin helps females become attached to men, have babies and bond with their children, thus giving them the greatest chance for a healthy future. In like manner,

Vasopressin helps men become attached to women and to their children.

These complicated processes offer a compelling pattern. They are designed to lead towards and strengthen long-term monogamous relationships, supporting and reinforcing the family structure that is so vital to our survival. However, we have also seen that these neurochemicals and processes are value-neutral. They can produce involuntary responses that result in all kinds of behaviour including activities that are dangerous and unwise.

The brain therefore is very involved in our decisions about sex and the actions that follow; far beyond what is apparent. We know that non-marital sexual activity can produce STDs and unplanned pregnancy, but it is just as clear that some of the most powerful effects of sex are emotional and psychological AND sinful.

What does this mean for young people whose brains and bodies are still growing and developing?

By engaging in sex, your actions actually speak words. In your own mind you may be thinking, “It’s just for one night” but that doesn’t change what you are saying with your body.

Whether you mean it or not, your flesh is shouting loud and clear, “I make my whole self a gift to you. Take me I am yours.”

When you have sex your action is saying to the other person “I give my whole, entire self to you. I belong to you and to you alone. You can do whatever you want with me. My body, my heart, my soul, my whole being is yours.”

The sexual bond is a permanent reality created by the very act itself, like the sticky tapes glued face to face. The mere attempt to separate will tear you apart emotionally and spiritually.

     Sexual Bonding Before Marriage Hurts.

The sexual bond makes sense only for a man and a woman who are married to each other. If you create this bond before getting married and try to walk away from it, you will do enormous damage to yourself emotionally and will suffer from it for the rest of your life: intense emotional pain, incurable diseases, depression and fear; ruined life and habitual sin. Creating a sexual bond before marriage always throws up devastating effects.

Married couples who had sex with a different partner before getting married can tell you their sad experiences. When they have sex now, it is difficult not to remember the other person or persons they had sex with. That other person or those other people get in the way of the couple’s love for each other.

But that’s not the worst part nor is it the greatest danger. Many couples engage in sex before marriage, create a sexual bond with each other and then get married. They get married because the sexual bond they have with each other is already incredibly strong. That may sound fine but it is not. One very serious problem arises when the couple begin to wonder whether they would have gone through with the wedding if they had been free from their sexual bond before marriage. They will never know the right answer, so the problem (doubt) will never go away. Why is this so?

They see young couples get engaged and then break off the engagement and they see how many couples who consider marriage never get married to each other and these will make them doubt whether they would have gone ahead with their own wedding if they had been free from illicit sexual bonds. That doubt will hunt them and may cause a severe crisis in their marriage.

Studies made by various people for various purposes agree that most successful marriages and the best sexual adjustments in marriage are made by two persons, neither of whom had had any sexual experience before marriage.

  Premature sexual experience among girls

Most of the premature sexual experience among girls has, strictly speaking, little to do with sex. It is based on curiosity, vanity and desire for male attention.

The first sexual experience, often disappointing and most times disgusting to the girl, is merely the price she pays for attention from someone.

Hence the best way to prevent teenagers from becoming sexually active prematurely is to help them develop higher self-esteem and good self-control.

The dangers of a promiscuous life style for teenagers

The worst case develops with teenagers who take up a promiscuous life style, sleeping with many different partners. The first sexual bond is strong, but something happens and they leave their first love behind only to start a new sexual relationship with someone else.

They leave their second partner and move on. Every time they do that, they lose their capacity to form normal emotional and spiritual bonds with someone and eventually they lose their capacity for sexual bonding.

Promiscuous teens become like sticky tape, which has lost all the stick. They are so damaged by tearing themselves away from sexual relationships that they completely lose their capacity for sexual intimacy. Sex becomes an encounter for pleasure for the sake of pleasure.

They cease to live a human life and live the life of a dog. Being a dog is fine for dogs, but we were never meant to live that way. They use sex to manipulate people or to overpower them with brutal force as happens in the case of rape. Sex is no longer an expression of love but a power struggle, an ego trip or even an expression of hatred.

Another important point to note about pre-marital/out-of-wedlock sex is that it lays the foundation for infidelity in marriage; whether one marries one’s sin-partner (illicit-fun partner) or someone else. If one marries one’s sin-partner and one of them becomes unfaithful thereafter (as is usually the case), the other spouse has little justifiable reason to complain because by engaging in premarital/out-of-wedlock sex, both of them unconsciously but tacitly approved of sex outside marriage as a good and desirable pastime since they indulged themselves in it before marriage. Actions speak louder than words! This is one of the reasons why people who married as virgins (or as secondary virgins) make the best sexual adjustments in marriage, have very low divorce rates etc.

(3 & 4) Sexually Transmitted Infections/diseases (STIs/STDs) and Pregnancy

The two main ideologies for the “prevention” of STDs and pregnancy are risk avoidance and risk reduction. Risk avoidance is achievable by simply avoiding the occasion of sin (pre-marital and extra-marital sex, romantic activities like kissing, necking etc.) as we advised above and how best to achieve this is through parental guidance, spiritual formation etc. But the heart-warming fact is that abstinence from sex until your wedding night (as well as mutual fidelity in marriage) is the only STD and pregnancy prevention method that is 100% efficient.  As for risk reduction the youth is misled into believing that with the use of condoms and other contraceptives, careful partner selection, and pure luck, it is possible to “prevent these risks and problems. The misinformation which needs correcting is that the risk comes with engaging in sex and that whatever else you do (before, during or after sex) is risk reduction not risk avoidance/prevention. And the sexperts have failed to disclose – much less promote – the agreement reached by all contraceptive manufacturers worldwide that “No contraceptive can guarantee 100 per cent effectiveness” and that this health warning clause is now mandatory for all contraception packaging.

Contraception comes in various forms. There are hormonal contraceptives: the pill, the patch, the shot, the gel, IUDs (Intrauterine devices) and barrier methods: condom, diaphragm, cervical cap, vaginal ring/sponge, spermicides etc.

               The Pill

The Oral Contraceptive Pill was first marketed in the USA in 1960 when it was decriminalized. The OC Pill suppresses ovulation (break-through ovulations do occur), thickens the cervical mucus, thins down the endometrium (womb lining) making it impossible for implantation of the embryo, slows down the movement of the zygote in the fallopian tube etc. and mimics pregnancy. For effective performance it must be taken at the same time every day for optimal performance – impossibility for most women and all girls.

               Pill Side-effects

One hormonal contraceptive pill manufacturer listed 37 possible adverse side-effects of the drug and every hormonal contraceptive pill a woman takes causes 150 chemical changes in her body [This fact is documented in the Textbook of Contraception by Malcolm Potts, Director of Planned Parenthood of England (Cambridge Press 1983, p.144)]. In 2005, the World Health Organization (WHO) classified The Pill (synthetic hormones) as Group 1 (there are 4 groups) carcinogen; in the same group as arsenic, asbestos, ionizing radiation, formaldehyde and tobacco. The International Agency for Cancer Research also confirmed this fact. The Pill has the biggest insert for all drugs; as many as 43 pages of tiny print.

Aside from increased risk of breast, liver and cervical cancers the Pill aids the transmission of HIV virus and other STDs and some of its other side-effects include increased risk of blood clots, hair loss, brain shrinkage, hardening of the arteries, weight gain, decreased libido, bone marrow density loss, and negative effects on mood, self-control, energy level, infertility, increased suicide risk etc.”[Blood clots lead to heart attacks, strokes, embolism, thrombosis etc.]

The Pill also accounts for 50% of male infertility in the western World through water contamination by the synthetic hormones of the OC Pill, which the female body is always incapable of using up completely.

BETTER BELIEVE THIS: The Pill misleads a spinster into making a wrong choice of a husband. If a woman is NOT contracepting, she will be attracted to a male whose immune system is a compliment to hers – this increases the possibility for fertility BUT “any drug specifically designed to eliminate ovulation and its associated psychological and physical changes will have maladaptive side-effects. This could have long-term consequences on the ability of couples to procreate and even the procreative success of their offspring”. Also a man who appeared attractive and caring to a woman who is on the pill will not be so loving and attractive to her when they marry and she goes off and stays off the pill to get pregnant. The Pill mimics pregnancy so its failure leads to a late detection of pregnancy by such mothers and thus to late-term abortions, because women on the pill will routinely abort when the pill fails; making contraception a slippery slope to abortion, which increases rather than decrease abortion.

As independently confirmed by abortion provider organizations, contraception failure rates are as follows: The Pill 9%, the shot & patch 6%, the IUD 1% and barrier methods 18%+.

              The condom

The male condom is arguably the most popular contraceptive. Married couples should note that ironically their use of these barrier methods of contraception actually leads to the so-called “un-protected sex” because a man’s seminal fluid contains at least two dozen ingredients: estrogens, follicle-stimulating hormone, luteinizing hormone, testosterone, transforming growth factor beta, and several different prostaglandins, which are beneficial to women. During intercourse the female body absorbs these ingredients, which help to improve their health. More importantly, if a couple (married or unmarried) decides to use the condom (or any other barrier method) for an extended period of time before having babies, the woman’s womb will not get accustomed to her mate’s sperm, and her immune system may treat them as foreign bodies. This can disturb the delicate balance of female hormones and cause the woman’s blood vessels to constrict, leading to higher blood pressure in the expectant mother. This condition known as preeclampsia occurs in about 5 to 8 percent of all pregnancies and can lead to premature delivery of the baby [Preeclampsia consists of high blood pressure, swollen legs (Oedema) and protein in blood]. Unfortunately, such pre-term babies are more likely to experience learning difficulties, cerebral palsy, epilepsy, blindness and deafness. Preeclampsia can also be dangerous for the mother; it is the third leading cause of maternal deaths during childbirth.

The natural rubber latex condom is so trusted yet is so unreliable. The primary danger of condom failure is not pores (holes, voids) but catastrophic failure when it tears, bursts, slips down and slips off the penis, and these well documented catastrophic failures (the condom has a failure rate of 18% for pregnancy and STDs) form the basis of the following important and unchallenged health warnings:

  1. “Warning: Condoms do not protect you from the HIV virus.” [Rubber Chemistry & Technology, Washington D C June 1992.]
  2. Trojan Brand Latex Condoms “Although the condom may help reduce the risk of a few infections, it cannot eliminate the risk of any” [TROJAN-ENZ, AMERICA’S #1 CONDOM].
  3. On June 12/13, 2000, four US Govt. agencies co-sponsored The Workshop Summary, which stated that “available scientific evidence indicated that the condom reduces the risk of HIV/AIDS by 85% for adults, gonorrhea by 70% (for men not women) and Human Papilloma Virus (HPV) by zero%” [The Workshop Summary].
  4. Durex, the biggest manufacturer of condoms, said on their website that “condoms do not stop the spread of AIDS”. Actually, condoms were first manufactured over 170 years ago and AIDS appeared only in 1981.
  5. Contraceptive Technology warning: “Faithful Condom User: ‘1 out of 12 Condoms Fails’” [Contraceptive Technology USA].
  6. A University of Miami Medical School study using volunteer couples showed that 3 out of 10 women whose HIV-infected husbands faithfully used condoms during their marital embrace contracted AIDS-related complex (ARC) in 18 months. This outcome translates into an infection rate of 21% per year, 38% in two years, 51% in three years, 70% in five years, and 91% in 10 years. The more you use the condom, the less efficient it becomes because familiarity breeds contempt.
  7. Condoms contain N-Nitrosamineone of the most potent carcinogens – which is absorbed during sex. It is added to condoms to make them more elastic [Stuttgart Chemical and Veterinary Research Office 28/5/2004 in The Guardian of 03/6/2004 p.44].
  8. Nononxynol-9 is a microbicide found in condoms, which may put women at a high risk of HIV infection.

              Abortion

Contraception is a slippery slope to abortion and so does not reduce abortion but rather increases it. This is because contraception users see pregnancy as a failure of technology for which they have a right to use surgical abortion (technology) to correct. When two elephants fight, the grass suffers; when science (the Pill) fights nature’s procreative power, the woman’s body suffers, hence the listed side-effects. Actually abortion was legalized in the UK (1968), the U.S. (1973) and France (1975) to correct contraception failures.

Abortifacient contraception, morning after pills, abortion pills, chemical abortion, and surgical abortions kill babies in the womb. Partial birth abortion kills babies at the point of birthing.

Note that substances and devices are abortifacient if they endanger the fertilized embryo by negatively influencing the endometrium or the hormone balance involved in implantation. Contraception sometimes stops fertilization from occurring. Sterilization is any procedure by which an individual is made incapable of procreation. All other abortions kill those babies abortifacients failed to kill. Note that once a woman is on contraception, she will see her pregnancy as a failure of technology and will “justify” abortion as an appropriate technology to correct this failure; abortion is the ultimate contraception, hence the USA legalized abortion in 1973 to correct the failure of contraceptives which they legalized (decriminalized) in 1960.

 

Othe side-effects of abortion (after the baby’s death) on the mother and father are legion:

        Physical Effects                        Psychological Effect

  • Sterility                Guilt
  • Miscarriages Suicidal impulses
  • Ectopic pregnancies Mourning/Withdrawal
  • Still birth Regret/Remorse
  • Bleeding and infections Loss of confidence
  • Shock and comas Low self esteem
  • Perforated uterus Preoccupation with death
  • Peritonitis Hostility/Rage
  • Fever/Cold sweat Despair/Helplessness
  • Intense pain Desire to remember birth date
  • Loss of body organs Intense interest in babies
  • Parts of baby left inside Thwarted maternal instincts
  • Pelvic inflam. disease Hatred for persons connected with

Abortion.

  • Crying/Sighing Desire to end relationship with partner
  • Insomnia Loss of sexual interest/Frigidity
  • Loss of appetite Inability to forgive self
  • Exhaustion Nightmares
  • Weight loss Decreased work capacity
  • Nervousness Seizures and tremors
  • Vomiting Feeling of being exploited
  • Gastro-intestinal    Horror of child abuse

disturbances

  • Breast cancer

Further points to note well about abortion: Pregnancy is not a disease. A child once conceived has a God-given right to be born. Only physical deformities can be seen by scanning as the soul of the baby is as perfect as any other. The baby in the womb is innocent of the rapist or incestuous father’s misdeeds and must not be made to suffer the death penalty that should be imposed on such fathers. Indirect abortions are morally approved for Utopic pregnancies because the baby is formed in the wrong organ thus endangering the lives of both mother and self. Babies growing in cancerous wombs will be removed with such wombs as the correct treatment for such diseased organs. Adoption is always a solution of last resort for crisis pregnancies and finally, out-of-wedlock pregnancy does not  ruin a girl’s life, it only alters it: a girl who dropped out of university at 18 due to a crisis pregnancy, had a baby boy and graduated top of her class at age 25. Finally, a girl’s first pregnancy (crisis or planned) could be her only pregnancy for life and no one can ever guarantee the consequences of terminating a pregnancy on a girl, because every human being is unique and no one knows for sure what a child could be.

Remember: “Seek truth while you are young, for if you don’t, it will later escape your grasp” [Plato]

In the light of the above revelations on premarital sex, the good youth would want to know the following: (1) When is it sex? (2) Does penetration have to occur for the act to qualify as “sex”? (3) Can two people “have sex” simply by touching each other even on top of their clothes? (4) Does oral sex count?

The most reasonable definition suggested by recent brain studies is that sexual activity is any intimate contact between two individuals that involves arousal, stimulation and/or a response by at least one of the two partners.

Sexual arousal does not begin with the parts of your body that feel the most aroused. Sexual excitement is actually centered in the brain. It is possible to be stimulated and even achieve orgasm without any physical contact with the sexual organs at all e.g. “wet dream” – when arousal and even ejaculation occurs in dreams during sleep (such “wet dream” is not a sin).

There is usually a progression of physical contact, touching, light kissing and other contact that sooner or later acquires the purpose of having sexual intercourse, hence you are warned to avoid the occasion of sin.

This fascinating process is clearly visible with modern brain scan technology, revealing different areas of the brain “lighting up”.

Thus showering together, oral sex, mutual masturbation and heavy petting are sexual activities since people can become infected with STDs and become pregnant by engaging in these activities with an infected person.

 

Engr. J E A Okwuosa,

DG Project for Human Development (PHD) jerryokwuosa@yahoo.com